Wishing you courage

"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying 'I will try again tomorrow'."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Goodbye glass jaw

Mother's Day is coming to a close. How did you all fare? Many thanks to you all for the comments on my last post. You're support has been more than I could even hope for!


I had a good day - at least a good day for a deadbaby mama, who's been kicked to the curb by her husband. Being family-less on Mother's Day was no worse than every other day.

First I slept in, then started a new Anita Blake book, then breakfast, gym, purchased own Mother's Day gift (below!), then dressed for dinner, stopped by the cemetery, treated myself to dinner (wine, papaya salad, red curry), came home and called my mom. Next will be ice cream and bed.


So, if mothers with living children could use pampering on Mother's Day to provide a break from the constant care the give, what could I use? NOT caring for my son makes me really pissed off. I'm not really mad at anyone or anything in particular, I'm just mad that my baby died. I need help processing the anger that comes along with this kind of motherhood.

So guess what lessons I'm getting!

First full training session is next Sunday. Today a gentleman named Tank taught me a move where you punch (or kick) your opponent, then get their arm in a hold, lift up which forces their head down, then you knee them in the face!


Sophie said...

I think that is SSSOOO cool! You are amazing. I wish I could take these classes with you. Sounds like a lot of frustration releasing fun!

angie said...

Awesome. Kickboxing! I could have used a pair of those and a heavy bag yesterday. XO

Ya Chun said...

you go girl!

have you printed pics of your ex to use for target practice?

yep, babies dying can make you angry. Good for you to find a vent. I think you amy be really sore after next week!

big hugs Anna

Sara said...

Punching through your anger sounds perfect!

My mother's day was ok up until my sister's boyfriend's father was about to serve me at dinner and then said, "Oh no, we have to serve the mothers first tonight!" and handed my bowl back to me empty. Hahahahahahahaha! WTF. To be fair, I don't think he knows what happened to me, but it was still pretty awful.